Thursday, December 30, 2010

#2 "Thats not our area."

On Christmas Eve this year I walked into the nearest Walmart with a mission to find a particular green oven mitt that was meant to go to my mother along with another gift. I had a picture of the fabric pattern on my phone and I knew the brand name. After looking through all the bathroom section, I called Lynnae and asked where the aisle was. She pointed me in the right direction. I found the aisle, but the mitts weren't there. I knew what I would do!

"I'll ask a helper!"

Disclaimer: I have traditionally had nothing but good experiences from asking Walmart helpers for a quick hand. But every once in a while you get the grumpy old lady at the cosmetics counter.

I looked around for a blue vest person, but there was not 1 in sight. Since patience is a virtue, I decided to just wait for one to come by. 15 minutes passed and still nobody was around. Here is where the befuddlement happened. I looked into cosmetics and saw 2 ladies in blue vests chatting to each other. "Score!" I thought, "They will know right off if the gloves are here." This is where the befuddling happened.

"Hey there. I was wondering if you carried any Green _____ Brand oven mitts?"

Both of these senior ladies looked at me like I was crazy. "Well you wont find any here in Cosmetics."

"Oh… ya I figured. Do you know if there is another oven mitt aisle or something?"

"Honey, you are in the Cosmetics section. You need to ask somebody in that section (pointing across the aisle)."

"I was just there for about 15 minutes and nobody has come past."

"We can't help you. That's not our area."

"Is there someone who could help me?"

"Go check over in sporting goods."

Am I alone in thinking that this is a little crazy. While I found it a little aggravating because of the fact that it was christmas eve and I was in a hurry, I left that experience chuckling all the way home. I am happy for the majority of people in the world that would "pretend" to help me but am even more grateful that there are these 2 ladies in the world that keep shopping unpredictable, unique and ultimately confusing.

p.s - I went back to the oven mitt aisle and asked a random lady if she saw any ______ brand green oven mitts and she said, "doesn't look like they have any in stock." As a male in my mid 20's who was searching for oven mitts, thats all I really needed to hear. Thank you nice lady!

#1 Holy Moly Jolie!

You go to the supermarket to get some yummy cereal and you find yourself stuck waiting in line for the cashier behind the lady with a purse full of nickels. What do you do? We glance over and see whats new Angelina Jolie. Or maybe with Brad, Lindsay, Tiger, those people from the Hills or Jersey shore.

I am proud to honestly say this, I have never really gone beyond what is on the front cover of those magazines but it sounds juicy! Unfortunately, I couldn't really care less in the end. However, this is sort of a big deal for many people. Celebrity problems are everything! They bring some women together and friendships can seem to be formed. I looked online and read an article which said that women who were better at gossiping have a better chance or living longer and healthier.

While I remain somewhere between neutral and uninterested, I observe that celebrities having complications is one of the most stimulating subjects for certain people. But do you know what is more stimulating? To watch the people who are watching the celebrities who are having complications. Try it out. I did. It is like watching people with problems watch people with problems. Is that not nice to say? Maybe they have caught an illness and are looking to this as a form of prolonging life.

Holy Moly Jolie!! You are curing people!

Intro to befuddlements

be·fud·dle  (bi - fud'l)
tr.v. be·fud·dled, be·fud·dling, be·fud·dles
    1. to confuse, muddle, or perplex
    2. to make stupid with drink

It is almost impossible to go out of your house or turn on the TV without witnessing a "Befuddlement." We see confusing things all around and we can react in multiple ways. We can either...

1. Become miffed, irked, bothered or even angry at things we see, smell or hear.

.: or :.

2. Bystand, learn and laugh at what we see.

James Allen explains things best when he says "A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts." We react negatively or we bystand and laugh.

So, what kind of am I talking about? What is my idea of a genuine befuddlement?
- The student in class who insists on prolonging an already boring class through asinine/pointless questions.
- The group of people who have NO idea what the movie was about but like it because it is so "artsy" and beautiful.
- Guys who are pregnant with their spouse. "We" are pregnant. (Or for their spouse. "I")

Befuddlements can be idly classified as mere "annoyances", but it is so much more. True befuddlements are hardly every one sided. In fact, your list of befuddlements would likely be much different than mine. You likely do not agree with some of them. The point is, they can make you look at life in a very intriguing light. I pride myself somewhat of an expert at noticing and spectating the craziness around me. To tell you the truth, I cause much of the craziness. But befuddlements make me happy for the people around me and makes life amusing. I will not say that these things are all bad things. Hey, maybe girl jeans just fit you guys better. Maybe you are just a really nice person who thinks creating a spontaneous handshake is the perfect way to "break the ice." So, just keep doing what you are doing if thats what you do. And if those things are some of the things that drive you crazy, sit back and observe. While the world leaves us confused, muddled, and perplexed, there is a chance for us to sit into our bystander roles and watch the quirks, twists and funny contrasts we see everyday.